January 24, 2004

Fun For The Whole Family

Posted in General at 2:18 am by Ian

I’m sure you’ve already heard of the penis game, so it should come as no surprise that my suitemates and I have managed (when we’re not making slavery jokes about Puerto Rico)to enhance the game. Take it to the next level, as it were.

See, the problem with the penis game, we reasoned, is that everyone knows you’re playing the penis game. Obviously, people in public places aren’t going to be shouting “Penis!” for no good reason (unless they’re playing a clever game), so the element of embarrassment is significantly lessened. So the trick is to come up with something to shout that is both horrendously embarrassing and is not recognizable as being the penis game.

We’ve come up with two possibilities, both of which work very well because successive repetitions make it sound as though you are having an argument, rather than just shouting a naughty word purely to give rise to prurience.

  • No, you don’t get to be Gandalf! I get to be Gandalf!
  • No, you gave me herpes!

Remember: Say it like you mean it.



  1. Kevin said,

    It should be noted that the “No, you gave me herpes!” game has yet to last longer than 3 successive sayings in a public place. Try it, it’s tough =P

  2. Matt said,

    Has Gandalf migrated out of SuiteNES? The four or five rounds it went there were priceless, but has it been tried in a public place?

  3. Ian said,

    We tried it at Platt. Got some strange looks. Even from Easties.

    They probably wanted to be Gandalf.

  4. Philip said,

    I think you could improve the effect by having a long gnarled wizard staff and/or a wizard hat that you each grabbed from the other while saying that you want to be Gandalf.

  5. Matt said,

    While blog posting bots may be the devil, I definitely laughed out loud when I saw that this one had found our herpes game.

  6. Ian said,


    For the record, it was a spam suggesting that we register the post with some sexual health directory.

    As a rule, though, I remove spam when I see it, so commenting on it will usually lead to confusing posts.

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